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Opinions of Wednesday, 25 July 2018

Columnist: Joel Savage

What is it like to be a woman?

I am a married man for the past 21 years, yet I can’t say I know a lot about women. My wife gets angry with me sometimes, when I know I’m right and she is wrong. But since I don’t want to lean upon my understanding, which may be wrong, I quickly apologize to her to create a happy atmosphere once again.

I work at a place with over forty female teachers. I ‘m always scared to smile, paranoid maybe, because I don’t want any of the ladies there to have in mind that I want her. I, therefore, maintain a serious mood at my workplace. Unfortunately, I was doing more harm to myself than good.

In the first year, I realized pure hatred from some of the teachers towards me. Action speaks louder than words, so don’t ask me how I know that they hate me, please. In fact, some people can’t control their emotions when they hate you. Many pretend they haven’t seen me, even though I’m very close to those tempting bodies, fashion and magic perfumes.

The hate towards me increased to a certain level that I decided to find a solution immediately, to present myself a faithful and trustful person among them. I started greeting those I’ve never greeted at the school before. Some just walked away without response but some gave me recognition and responded. That encouraged me to continue the greetings.

Did I forget myself as an African, when there is a proverb in Africa that says a woman is a beautiful flower in the middle of the garden and the man is the fence around it? Did I also forget that in Mexico, it is said men that treat women very good were brought up by queens?

“If she's amazing, she won't be easy. If she's easy, she won't be amazing. If she's worth it, you won’t give up. If you give up, you're not worthy. ... Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.” Did I also forget this great quote from the reggae legend, Bob Marley?

Once you have a clean heart and ready to change things in your life, you will be successful. I became friendlier with a broad smile on my face daily. Once I met one of the ladies who hate me most, with a cup of coffee in one hand and books in the other hand, trying to open a door and I rushed like the late Christopher Reeve in his Super Man series, to open the door for her.

It was that very day, she asked of my name and she told me hers. Since then we communicate regularly and laugh over many things. In life, never judge a woman wrongly. Like every human being, some are introverts and others extrovert. Some may be very quiet but that doesn't mean that they hate you, while others quickly engage in conversation with you.

So what is it like to be a woman? Don’t feel great or superior to a woman. Respect her opinion and don’t underestimate her. That will open the way to know her very well to understand the sort of creatures women are.