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Opinions of Friday, 29 July 2016

Columnist: Counselor Frank Adofoli

What every son needs to know before marriage

One of the happiest things in life is when you know you are in love with someone who is even more in love with you. Not someone you have to convince, beg, test or impress.

Many young men and women just miss it when it comes to relationships. Some learn from their parents, others from their peers and a majority from TV.

I am getting worried about how young people have accepted what is wrong to be right, and the worst part is they refuse to learn but want to experiment with life. Most end up with the same mistakes their parents committed, while others go beyond that, making it worse.

I have started with my syllabus at home on values I will teach my kids. If for nothing, I want to leave a good legacy on earth. Anyone married to my son or daughter will be blessed.

Issues of the heart cause so much pain; no wonder a heart break is worse than the most fatal accident for some people. As far as we all have a heart, we all have feelings.

But one truth is the heart dies when it is not able to share its feelings and a heart kills itself when another heart does not understand.

I will raise my son to be a complete gentleman. A man who understands the word "RESPECT" and knows how to respect a woman. To be the gentleman on whom the wife can depend no matter what; Prove to her that she can always count on him and he will never let her down.

If my son sees a woman who has everything going for her but he is not ready to add value to her life, he should just admire her from a distance and never disrupt her greatness.

Teach him that, every girl needs a good guy who can help her laugh when she thinks she will never smile again. I will let him know the number one needs of a woman is security, she wants to feel safe around him and in his heart.

To never make her feel jealous or her position threatened, but rather make her feel special, that she is the most beautiful girl in the world and he is blessed to have her.

I will teach my son the difference between sex and affection. Affection means love to a woman but not the other way round. Write a poem for her, tell her how beautiful she is, feel proud to hold her hand in public, walk with her, crack jokes and never make another man be responsible for her smile.

My son will learn to respect the woman's body and never ask her to expose it or give it to him before altar.

Provide for her and put his family first. Be the priest, pastor and father at home; to be the first son for his wife and a hero for their son.

In conclusion "Teach a child to choose the right path, and when he is older, he will remain upon it". - Proverbs 22:6 (TLB)

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