Marriage is about sacrifice, not love – Kwame Adumatta

“It seems to me that we do not understand marriage. Marriage is about sacrifice, not love. If you cannot sacrifice, then you do not know what love is. We have destroyed that thing called love”. This statement was made by renowned marriage counsellor, Mr. Kwame Adumatta, on Maakye.

Mr. Adumatta holds the perception that marriage is more about making sacrifices than just being in love. He said that marriage involves looking beyond the flaws of one’s partner and ‘clinging to each other’. “Love is a resultant of like. If I have crooked legs, or huge ears or big lips, and you like me the same, then it becomes love. In marriage, you cling – you do everything together with your partner”, he advised.

He also added that marriage goes beyond an extravagant wedding reception and saying vows. “Wedding is not marriage. Wedding is an announcement that you have been elevated to a higher social status. Marriage is two sides of the world – good and bad, bitter and sweet, beautiful and ugly”, he said. According to him, the word ‘submissiveness’ has been abused by people, especially husbands who try to exhibit chauvinistic attitudes.

He made mention of the KISS – Keep It So Secret, adding that there are only three people in a marriage who are the husband, wife and God. He advised married couples to have their own concept of marriage and keep their marital problems to themselves.