Why psychologists encourage self-love on Valentine's Day

Today, February 14, the world commemorates Valentine’s Day. While receiving external validation from loved ones in the form of gifts and attention has been the centre of valentine’s day, psychologists, in recent times are suggesting that focusing on self-care and self-love is an equally great way to get through the day, especially for individuals who may be single and find the day overwhelming.

Defined by the World Health Organization, self-care is: “the ability of individuals, families, and communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and to cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a healthcare provider.” In 2019, published in a self-care framework in The BMJ, researchers point out that in addition to self-care being the activities individuals do on their own to promote physical and emotional health, it also includes the ways that individuals interact with clinicians and healthcare systems to tend to physical and emotional health.

“That means self-care includes things like getting a vaccine, scheduling cancer screenings, or taking prescription medications on schedule,” the researchers emphasized. Echoing similar sentiments, Health and Productivity advisor, Thea O’Connor, in the article Psychology of self-care: it’s about self-worth reiterates self-care as a positive lifestyle practice, “If you don’t truly value and appreciate yourself, you will be dependent on getting external validation from others to feel good about yourself,”

In contrast, when she argues that, “you really connect with your essence and all the valuable qualities you bring to the world every day, [when you practice self-care]. You don’t get stressed about others’ possible (and often imagined) reactions to your boundaries or choices, because you have your own supply of self-appreciation to draw upon. You also know that self-care is a win-win and that by taking care of yourself, you are also taking care of others. When you are well-slept, for example, your mood will be so much better the next day, and your colleagues will be spared your bad vibes.”

Simple Ways to Prioritize Self-Care this Val’s Day

Reassess old goals or set new goals for yourself: Setting and working towards goals can give you a sense of purpose and accomplishment, and forms a great aspect of self-care. According to leaders in goal-setting theory, Edward Locke and Gary Latham (1990), goals not only affect behaviour as well as job performance, but they also help mobilize energy which leads to a higher effort overall. Goals help motivate people to develop strategies that will enable them to perform at the required goal level. So this Valentine’s Day, make a list of things you want to achieve and make a plan for how you will achieve them.

Treat yourself: Take some time to do things that you enjoy and that make you happy. This could be anything from indulging in a luxurious spa day to treating yourself to a fancy dinner.

Exercise and eat a healthy diet: Regular physical activity has been shown to improve mood, reduce stress, and boost self-esteem. Aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise per day, such as brisk walking, cycling, or swimming. Also,a diet high in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains can boost mood and energy levels. Avoid processed foods and excessive amounts of sugar and caffeine.

Find a way to give back through Volunteering: Giving back to others can be a great way to feel fulfilled and appreciated. To give love and feel the love on Valentine’s day, it will be good to consider volunteering at an orphanage, community school or community centre.

Spend time with loved ones: Surround yourself with friends and family who love and support you. Plan a fun activity together or simply spend the day catching up and enjoying each other's company.

Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, yoga, and deep breathing can help reduce stress and improve focus. This Valentine’s Day, incorporate mindfulness practices into your daily routine, even if it's just a few minutes. It’s a great way to support your mental health and wellness,
Celebrate yourself: Write down your accomplishments, qualities, and things you love about yourself. Reflect on your journey and celebrate the amazing person you are.

PI/WA