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Opinions of Thursday, 13 April 2023

Columnist: DC KWAME KWAKYE

The relationship between life, friendship and football clubs

A file photo A file photo

Life has many phases and things pan out due to time and periodicity. Everything happens in life for a reason but our inability to comprehend the happenings sometimes bemuses most of us.

The life we live and the friendships we develop with others along the way and how things work out are synonymous to a football club: you gain some while you loose others, Eleanor Roosevelt's quotation come in handy "If life were predictable it would cease to be life, and be without flavor."

There are some relationships once developed, you can keep for life, others are also very ephemeral. The longevity or ephemerality of any relationship is dependant on the two parties involved. Some friends are so sweet to be with and one must necessarily do everything possible to maintain same.

We all attended school and had mates. However, there are some mates of yours you may never see nor hear from till eternity. That is life! There are others you only get to hear of when they've passed on. That's life!

Technological Improvements is contributing to the quality of life and has helped make relationship maintenance quite easy. Facebook, WhatsApp, Twitter and the other social media platforms have helped in this regard. With regard to WhatsApp, groups platforms are formed by old school mates and that helps makes reconnection to old mates a little easy. This has made it possible for all of us to hear from others, we wouldn't normally hear from and can have a fair idea about what they are about.

Some people come across your path for a short while for a particular purpose. Once that purpose is met, the relationship is severed. "We have three types of friends in life: Friends for a reason, friends for a season and friends for a lifetime". Not all relationships would thrive on but, for the relationship to thrive or survive, would be dependant on the two of you. Sometimes, the two persons involved cannot help matters but to go their separate ways. That's Life!

There are some relationships that are mutually beneficial, but certain attitudes can affect the relationship, you may go your separate ways but may meet after several years and begin the rebuilding from where you left off and see how both of you can work out and make things better. In other situations, based on how one feels, you can meet and nothing would work between the two of you. That's life! There are other relationships that are highly parasitic and not mutually beneficial, but communalism and commensalism in terms of relationship are mutually beneficial and must be encouraged.

What's even very depressing are the friends you've gone out of your way to help or assisted to be where they are, but when you need their help that is where they begin to give you all manner of excuses and reasons why you should wait or they cannot help you. Sad though, but, that's the reality of life. This irony could happen between you and an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend or former wife or husband or even a family member that you deliberately assisted but when you need their help they offer advise. That's life!

In order to enjoy your friendship with others, try and spend time on your relationship with people and show gratitude, that's the only way you would survive and make it in life. People would disappoint you but one lesson I've learnt in life is that, the people who would help you would regardless of what others say. Someone can lift you up from the abyss and set you upon a rock. Lift you up from nowhere to somewhere. From nobody to somebody but when that happens, just be grateful. That's life!

My analogy to life, friends and a football team is like this. Football Clubs buy players, mould them to become stars and the players decide to leave when the clubs need them most. Indeed some players leave the clubs without paying their dues and the club struggles. In some very disturbing situations the club buys stars and they cannot perform to merit the investment made in them. In some other situations, the club buy stars who come and pay their dues and stay with the club and play their best football for them. Others even spend their entire career with a particular club. Stars are also bought and they perform before living a club. That's Life!

So you see, these are the dynamics of life. Some friends are like how players behave in relation to football clubs. Others would leave when needed most or neglect you in your time of need or even pretend not to know you. But, true friends would find a way to look for you, assist you and make life beautiful for you.

No hard feelings about those who have decided to repudiate you. Life is a cycle and everything seems to go round in a circle. Make your friendship to others count. Let them mention your name in association with their joy and not sorrow. Let people say but for you, they couldn't fathom how they could have come this far. Players who pay their dues to clubs become legends of the club and their memories are etched in the sands of time.

Everybody needs somebody, so must you also help others realise their dream. To those who feel betrayed by their friends, note that in life just like a football club, you loose some friends and gain others. There are some you cannot do away with and will be around till eternity. There are others no matter what you do for them, they would leave you behind and move on. There are others too, you would leave them behind and move on as well.

But, whichever way it happens, you should always make sure, you're not the one who betrayed your friendship. "For there to be betrayal, there would have to have been trust first", Suzanne Collins. God help us all to be better friends. After all, life is beautiful when you are because others are and when others are because you are. This is the relationship between life, friendship and a football club for you.