Of the controversial kiss in Australia that’s still making global headlines

When recently I caught a snippet of a BBC radio bulletin, about a hunger strike by the mother of Luis Rubiales, to protest what she sees as the persecution of her son, the beleaguered Spanish football official in trouble over a kiss, I thought I had either misheard the item, or it was fake news.

But print media reports confirmed it. Moreover, Angeles Bejar had said that her hunger strike would continue until people stopped “the inhuman, bloodthirsty witch hunt which my son is being subjected to”.

Just in case anybody reading this has not been following the kiss saga, a fallout from the 2023 FIFA Women’s World Cup final in Australia, or has just arrived from Mars, here is the background:

On August 20, Spain beat England 1 – 0 to become the Women’s World Cup champions. Mr Rubiales, 46, president of the Spanish soccer federation (RFEF), apparently showed his appreciation to Jenni Hermoso, described as a “star player” (although the winning goal had been scored by Olga Carmona), by giving her a kiss on the mouth, afterwards claiming it had been “consensual”.

Rubiales’ kiss at the medal ceremony at the Stadium Australia, in Sydney, immediately generated global strong disapproval as being extremely inappropriate. Since then there has been a flood of calls for him to resign – all of which he has strenuously resisted, despite condemnation for disgracing his position and Spain.

Worse, the controversial kiss has overshadowed the Spanish team’s brilliant achievement, as all the attention has been on his most ill-judged and unwanted kiss, instead of plaudits for the team, and Spain.

The following are two summaries of the infamous incident:

Reuters (News Agency, August 31)

When the final whistle blew in Sydney and Spain had won, Rubiales grabbed his crotch in celebration. Presenting Hermoso with her medal, he held the player on the head and kissed her lips. (Emphasis added.)

World governing body FIFA opened disciplinary proceedings against Rubiales and on Aug. 26 provisionally suspended him from all football-related activities for 90 days.

He asked: "A consensual peck is enough to get me out of here? I will fight until the end." However, the RFEF's regional representatives have urged his resignation.

“Rubiales faces at least three legal and administrative challenges, which carry potential sanctions ranging from sacking and disqualification to prison time,” Reuters noted.

Slate (online daily magazine, based in the US)

By Christina Cauterucci (August 30):

At the postgame medal ceremony, each Spanish player filed down a line of top soccer officials, shaking hands and accepting her medal. When the players got to Rubiales, who was visibly brimming with joy, he embraced them.

He planted passionate kisses on their cheeks and necks. He lifted some women off the ground. With star player Jenni Hermoso, Rubiales held her by the head and kissed her on the mouth.

I was watching the ceremony on live TV, and Rubiales’ manhandling was so blatant I could hardly believe what I was seeing.

Responding to a question about the kiss Hermoso said “No me ha gustado, eh (In English: “I didn’t like it.”) Hermoso also clarified in a statement that “at no time did I consent to the kiss that he gave me.”

Rubiales and RFEF are stubbornly insisting that the kiss was consensual and that Rubiales’ critics were “idiots” and “fake feminists.” Rubiales told a reporter, “When two people have a minor show of affection, we can’t listen to idiocy.” He gave a cursory apology in a video the day after the kiss.

Dozens of the Spanish players released a statement through their union, that they would refuse to play for Spain if Rubiales remained in charge. RFEF finally asked for Rubiales’ resignation on Monday, more than a week after the kiss, Ms Cauterucci wrote.

Here in Ghana, I see a universal relevance of this incident in two ways: firstly, it illustrates vividly the sense of entitlement some men in positions of authority everywhere feel towards the women they work with, or whom they supervise. Secondly, the reaction of his mother, depicts a doting parent who won’t accept that her child has misbehaved.

The many excuses Mr Rubiales has given about the kiss all cast doubts on the “consensual” claim. At a point he even said Ms Hermoso had been the one who lifted him up for the kiss – which TV images soon disproved!

Dictionaries define ‘consensual’ as “all parties are in agreement that they consent to it”.

As an observer in far-away Ghana, I can only pose rhetorical questions, but I will ask all the same:

By saying that it had been “consensual”, did he mean that he had been told by a seer that Spain would win; and that Ms Hermoso would play brilliantly and therefore, he had made a pre-match pact with her that he would give her a congratulatory kiss on her lips?

If so, was his wife ‘in the know’? Secondly, if Ms Hermoso has a partner, was her partner, too, aware of that agreement?

A “show of affection” means that he and Ms Hermoso were in a relationship or were best friends?

Mind you, as the images circulating on the internet show, it was no ordinary, avuncular or friendly ‘well done!’ peck on the cheek or forehead. All the photos confirm that Rubiales held her head firmly with his hands, forcing her towards him. Even if the poor woman had wanted to refuse his unwanted kiss, she couldn’t have!

As for his mother’s hunger strike, it’s not surprising that a parent would want to back her child. But her drastic action can be seen as a kind of blackmail to stop the calls for punishment for her son’s unacceptable conduct. Such behaviour of an overindulgent parent can verge on the ridiculous.

Fortunately, she had to end her hunger strike on the third day, after being taken ill. She was hospitalised, discharged hours later, and taken home by her son.

To me the irony is that Madam Bejar herself has the solution to the quagmire that the kiss saga has become. All she has to do is to advise her son to resign, and thus even put to shame all the “idiots and inhuman witch hunters” who she claims are hounding her son. His immediate resignation could have turned the tables in his favour, possibly earning him the respect of the sporting world and others as a person of integrity.

Naturally, Rabiales may have some supporters, but how can the Spanish football authorities and others all be wrong and Rubiales and his mother believe that only they are right?

No doubt Rabiales has entered world football history for the wrong reasons. And it looks like his mother might have earned a page in parenting guidebooks as an example of questionable parenting.

Above all, I would dearly love to know the reaction of Rubiales’ partner if he’s in a relationship. I can even imagine her asking him: “Is this type of kiss the only way you could show your appreciation for the player’s excellent performance?”

But maybe he’s lucky enough to have a partner to whom he can say without fear of any dire consequences “oh, it was a consensual kiss.”

Anyway, the indications are that the controversial kiss saga will continue to make global headlines.

ajoayeboahafari@yahoo.com

Ajoa Yeboah-Afari © 2023 BBC correspondent (‘Focus on Africa’ programme, 1984 – 1996); President of the Ghana Journalists Association (October, 2003 – May, 2006); first Public Affairs Officer, Commonwealth Secretariat, London, (January, 1997 – September, 2002).