Introduction

On November 13, 2024, I published an article titled 'Helping Daughters Build Healthy Relationships: Tackling the Phenomenon of Father Complex', which focused on 'Father Complex or Daddy Issues' and the negative effects of a lack of father involvement in child nurturing and its consequences for the future relationships of daughters. Although Father Complex affects both male and female children, the earlier article focused on the daughter-father relationship.

Over time, and upon deep reflection, I have been compelled to come up with another piece – this time highlighting Father Complex or Daddy Issues, emphasizing how it affects the boy child as well.

Incidentally, based on the patriarchal nature of humanity's evolutionary journey, baby rearing has always been the preserve of women. Recently, experts in psychology have begun researching how male non-involvement has negatively impacted the holistic growth of children, leading to Father Complex or Daddy Issues, thereby underscoring the rationale for men to be heavily involved in child nurturing. This piece would focus on what Father Complex or Daddy Issue is and it's effects on the boy child.



What is Father Complex?



It is a psychological term referring to unintentional associations or instincts related to a father figure, which can manifest in various ways in an individual's thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. A father complex can also be described as a group of unconscious associations to a father figure. This implies that people with this complex tend to make subconscious or deliberate decisions (often in relationships) that have a connection with their image of a father (Thechildtherapylist.com, 2022).

Perspective Counselling, 2025, explains that a father complex develops when a person's relationship with their father is poor. The need for approval, support, love, and understanding progresses into adulthood and may result in bad decisions with relationships. In sum, it is a phenomenon that affects all genders and can exhibit in different ways. A father complex can also subconsciously affect how people feel or think about fathers and pseudo father-like authority figures.

Effects of Father Complex in boys

A "father complex" in boys refers to a situation where the boy struggles with a dysfunctional relationship with his father, often leading to issues with self-esteem, relationships, and overall well-being in adulthood. These issues can manifest in various ways, impacting emotional security, trust, and the ability to form healthy bonds. The effects of "daddy issues" affecting boys can range from relationship issues to emotional security and trust issues, manifestation of negative behaviour, self-worth and confidence issues, and identity and role model issues.

Relationship Issues:

Boys with "daddy issues" may have difficulty forming and maintaining healthy relationships, both romantic and platonic, arising from the deficit of fatherlessness. Psychologically, boys with an unresolved father complex may struggle to trust others, particularly men or authority figures, due to past experiences of betrayal or abandonment from their fathers.

Incidentally, while some boys might also fear getting too close to others, fearing rejection or disappointment, and may have difficulty expressing their emotions and needs in relationships; others with a father complex or Daddy Issues may experience intense anxiety in relationships, fearing being left or rejected.

I've always argued that in life, one can only give what one has. Dysfunctional relationships and deficits experienced by boys with Father Complex issues affect almost all other relationships they enter into as they grow. Consequently, Daddy issues can drastically impact boys' psychological well-being and their ability to connect with others, leading them to make bad relationship choices in adulthood (Rusciano, 2025).

Emotional Security and Trust:

Boys who experience a lack of a positive, supportive father figure may struggle to develop a strong sense of emotional security and trust in others, particularly men. Dysfunctional relationships with their own fathers can cause them to struggle with trust, including with women. The absence of a secure, loving father or male figure can cause some boys to struggle to form and maintain healthy relationships, especially with female partners, due to a lack of experience.

Fatherlessness, as it affects boys, normally leads to low self-esteem issues arising from a lack of positive validation and affirmation from a father. This low self-esteem and sense of being unlovable affect their love life. Inconsistent father-boy relationships, marked by a father being overly critical, inconsistent and neglectful, cause boys to develop issues that especially affect their romantic relationships.

Self-Worth and Confidence:

Low self-esteem is one consequent effect of a strained father-son relationship. Another negative impact of an absent or dismissive father is that boys struggle to believe in their abilities and themselves. Men must not be too dismissive of their boys' suggestions and lines of thought. Such feelings of low self-worth, stemming from father absence or a dismissive father, lead to feelings of inadequacy, self-contempt, and worthlessness. Boys who lack self-worth are unable to set boundaries, coupled with trust and anxiety, fear of failure, and difficulty in being assertive, which restricts their ability to set boundaries, leading to a feeling of being taken advantage of by others.

Identity and Role Models:

Fathers give their boys an identity, and without a positive father figure, boys may struggle to develop a strong sense of what it means to be a man. Fathers are the biggest role models for their sons. The lack of a father figure causes boys to rely on cultural stereotypes or peers for role models, leading to confusion and uncertainty. Without positive male role models, specifically fathers, boys may be more susceptible to negative influences, such as involvement in gangs or other undesirable behaviours. The lack of direction from a male figure or father could potentially lead to confusion and difficulty in setting their own path in life.

Perhaslps, this could be the reason why, in a typical Akan society, no child lacks a father or father figures. In situations where a child is fatherless, the family appoints someone to provide the patriarchal role for the child, showcasing the level of seriousness the Akan society placed on father presence in the lives of children.

Negative Behaviours:

Some availaible data also suggest that children without fathers are 10 times more likely to abuse chemical substances, and 71% of all children who abuse substances come from fatherless homes (National Center for Fathering, 2023). Another study found that 75% of adolescent patients in substance abuse centers come from fatherless homes (U.S. DOJ Office of Justice Programs, 1998).

The consequent effects of being fatherless are dire, which can lead to most negative behaviours exhibited by boys as they grow. The emotional impact of a strained or absent father-child relationship can contribute to mental health concerns such as depression, anxiety, and other behavioural problems. In some cases, boys trying to cope with the dysfunctional father-son relationship turn to unhealthy behaviours or substance use as a way to cope with the pain and emotional distress associated with the complex paternal relationship.

Conclusions

The foregoing exegesis highlights the enormity of the negative consequential effects boys suffer from a Father Complex. A strong and positive father-son relationship is crucial for a boy's development, influencing his confidence, sociability, and ability to navigate life's challenges. A lack of a positive father-son connection can lead to negative effects such as relationship issues, emotional security and trust issues, negative behaviour, self-worth and confidence issues, and identity and role model issues.

"A boy needs a father to show him how to be in the world. He needs to be given swagger, taught how to read a map so that he can recognize the roads that lead to life and the paths that lead to death..." - Ian Morgan Cron. This supports my viewpoint that a man can only give what he already has - a boy can become a better man or father if his father educates him on the nuances of how to navigate life to become a better father in the future.

Again, Charles Kettering adds, "Every father should remember that one day his son will follow his example, not his advice." Thus, it is imperative for fathers to give their utmost best care for their kids, especially the boy child. Tomorrow can only be replete with responsible fathers fit for purpose, and that will be determined by the successes of today's fathers.

DC KWAME KWAKYE, is Fatherhood Advocate, author of 'Beyond Fatherhood: Changing The Narrative'. Beyond Fatherhood - a Facebook page which seeks to raise enlightened fathers for generational transformation. You can reach him 0506988442 or 02449776550 for any public engagements. Thank you.