Letter From The President: Of pigs, vultures and rats

Countrymen and women, loyalists and opponents,
I have just recovered from a sudden bout of presidential schizophrenia. Mama Tess was very worried about my inability to catch some sleep. All through my distress, she kept asking all sorts of wifely questions in an attempt to investigate the cause of my sudden bout of presidential schizophrenia. She used some of her long-forgotten nursing skills, all to no avail. I knew what was bothering me but I couldn’t bring myself to tell her. As she kept pestering me, seeking answers to her questions about what I was brooding over, I retorted that she’d better get a better hairstyle as the one she was wearing looked more like a bird’s nest. I just couldn’t bring myself to tell her what was actually bothering me. But not for long.