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Opinions of Thursday, 21 August 2008

Columnist: Ntsiful-Benjamin, Quesi

When You Meet The Master

The story is quintessentially Nigerian. The characters are the finest that connoisseurs have long identified. The plot is not stylistically different from the others we are used to: A poor fellow in a cosmopolitan location tries hard to make a living. A rich man pops onto the scene and schools him on how to get rich quickly. He becomes very rich to start his own business. Then, there is a well-deserved tragedy at the end. The curtain closes.

So, what is special about The Master, as the film was appropriately titled? It is the setting: both in place and in time. If you have an email address, then you would have no difficulty seeing yourself as a vicarious participant in the world of the drama, as it unfolds. Do you often wonder why people fall victim to advance fee fraud (419)? A strange person hides behind cyber anonymity to describe a scenario, often not a brilliantly crafted one, and sends it into your inbox. The stories vary: The only daughter of a captured warlord is the sole beneficiary to the father’s estate. Vast amounts of cash have been stashed in a foreign bank. All she wants is a person who would help to get the money transferred to her for a generous percentage. She doesn’t have a bank account, so she would have to use yours. Another time, it is the finance director of a multinational company who wants to share $230million with you. But, first, he wants you to pay a relatively small amount of money into a certain account, to help unlock the millions.

Even the greatest buffoon on earth shouldn’t fall for that trick, you would think? Often, you would have the gaping opportunism of a prostitute or the gullibility of a twit, or both to believe that millions of dollars would rain into your bank account for doing nothing. Well, you would think yourself very wise until you meet The Master. A rich businessman approaches a pharmaceutical company to request a chemical that is so scarce. He is desperate and has millions to spend. You don’t have the particular brand he wants, so you convince him to accept a good substitute. He wouldn’t budge. He goes away with his millions, but he is kind enough to leave his contact details behind. Much later, a chemical dealer arrives at the scene, promising to deliver large quantities of the exact chemical the rich man had earlier asked for. It sounds like a good business opportunity, isn’t it? You are duped. How do you spot The Master in a transaction like this? It is not very easy.

What about a decent-looking young lady flagging you to stop to attend to something that looks like an emergency. She has a pathetic story. Her handbag was snatched. She needs to travel to her destination but has missed the flight. She has several pieces of luggage to carry. Besides, she speaks your language. Do you take her for one of the devils on the streets or you would dare to show some compassion? She is the Master here; you are the slave. Give her some money for the next available flight or take her home to cool it all off. She wins either way. Sometimes, many a Good Samaritan would do both.

The best way to deal with scenarios like these is to sit back and enjoy the stories, in much the same way as you would savour them if they were stories in a typical African movie.

Quesi Ntsiful-Benjamin Ottawa, Canada:

Email: ntsiful_benjamin@yahoo.co.uk