Opinions of Thursday, 25 February 2016

Columnist: Kwarteng, Francis

The New Patriotic Party should bring back Afari Gyan - and then what?

The New Patriotic Party (NPP) Should Bring Back Afari Gyan Then: What!

NANA OBIRI BOAHENE QUOTE

“As for the present EC boss, she is a pale shadow of Dr. Afari Gyan; comparatively, Dr Afari Gyan was better…As the Electoral Commission of Ghana, if you consider the utterances and comments of some of the members, you will know that they have outlived their usefulness.”

WHAT WE THINK OF THESE NPP FOLKS

Sometimes, one reads statements and communiqués from these NPP folks and one quickly wonders aloud whether these folks mean what they say, and whether they should be taken serious, after their having dragged Kwadwo Afari Gyan and the Electoral Commission (EC) to court for their alleged role in rigging the 2012 general elections, a trial the NPP bitterly lost. What do we make of their present shameful volte-face about their perceived and real enemy, Afari Gyan, the same man who oversaw two major general elections all of which John Kufuor won? Is the NPP an insane asylum?

What do these NPP folks actually want from Ghanaians? First, these NPP folks questioned her nationality prior to and in the wake of her appointment to the chair of the EC, claiming that she was a Nigerian. This partisan concoction did not fly, however. Before long they quickly dropped it like a hot Ebola-infested fecal matter. Ironically, they are now eating their hot Ebola-infested fecal matter back like humanoid coprophagic ruminants. Second, while they were calling her citizenship into question and raising hell they were also secretly writing her long drooling “love letters.” Third, now that she has jilted them by throwing the secret drooping “love letters” at them they are calling her names.

Of course, she threw the stinking drooling “love letters” at them causing them to fume and froth at their grotesquely misaligned mouths. Is this stinking oral-cavity frothing the result of unpremeditated political seizures which the screwed-up leadership of the NPP could be suffering from? Possibly. Possibly not. We do not know for sure. We would however have wished their statement to the effect that, Kwadwo Afari Gyan was better than Madam Charlotte Osei was never true, and that it was a fabrication by lazy journalists. Better in what way, we ask? In physique? Have the shameless viragoes in the NPP suddenly become political homosexuals?

These NPP folks and their crazy politics! Where is Kwadwo Afari Gyan to take over the EC chair again? Now, it appears they had wished Kwadwo Afari Gyan, the better man now, were the Chair of the Electoral Commission, a “prophet” who was and still is never respected in his own town, the tribalistic alien town of the NPP! What can we do with this bunch of political naggers?

But, with the NPP in total disarray for lack of effective political and campaign strategies to pre-empt incumbency, one cannot simply underestimate their frustrated politics of demonology, something the French aptly call Pierrot show and the British concert party. Kwadwo Afari Gyan must be laughing in retirement, wondering if these other Ghanaians who constitute the NPP are in fact political tenants of an insane asylum. What will John Kufuor make of this laughable political craziness?

And if Kwadwo Afari Gyan is better than Madam Charlotte Osei, why will they [the NPP] not petition President Mahama and the Supreme Court to force the former out of retirement, to reassume the chairmanship of the EC? The NPP and Nana Obiri Boahene must be in a state of delirium and cyclic foolishness to ever entertain the political delusion that, among other expectations, Kwadwo Afari Gyan will come back for their protracted and unending nonsense, for the man is too enough not fall for their nagging bait. It is in this regard that we have consistently presented the argument that our politicians be subjected to a vigorous battery of psychological tests to ascertain the state of their psychological balance, or emotional imbalance.

As a matter of fact, some of our politicians appear to be mentally unbalanced. Unfortunately, we are not taking this argument serious as a people because we want to see such politicians go naked in the open before we begin to do something about the situation. Perhaps politics itself could trigger political madness, what we see in the case of Nana Obiri Boahene. Let us read this again: “Despite accusing him [Afari Gyan] on several occasions of bias and dragging him to the Supreme Court in the historic 2012 election petition, the New Patriotic Party (NPP) says Dr. Afari Gyan as Electoral Commission (EC) Chairman, was far better than the incumbent Chairperson, Charlotte Osei.” Now they believe Kwadwo Afari Gyan can rig the elections for them!

How far better than is better than? How can the Kwadwo Afari Gyan, the electoral thief, be better? How can Madam Charlotte Osei be “a pale shadow” of the electoral thief”? Ironically, the deployment of the phrase “a pale shadow” gives the impression that the electoral thief is the lesser of two devils! What will become of Madam Charlotte Osei if she rigs the election for the NPP? Will she be better than the original electoral thief? Only the confused political psychology of the NPP can tell with any measure of delirious certainty. Again, one does not and will never know what these NPP folks actually want as long as they go round and round and round in endless circles.

This is not to say we are patronizing the NDC. Far from it. Both the NPP and the NDC are the same. Every fact points to the idea that the two are more alike than they are dissimilar. The social democracy of the NDC and the free-market capitalism of the NPP are the same: Kleptomania.

WHAT DO THESE NPP FOLKS ACTUALLY WANT

What we will rather want to know from this concert NPP folks is, if they actually want Kennedy Agyapong, Afia Schwarzenegger, Kweku Bonsam, Sir John, Bishop Daniel Obinim, Agya Koo, Super OD, Isaac Owusu Bempah, Mensa Otabil, Akrobeto, Mr. Ibu, Funny Face…as the Chair of the EC? Where are their political schizophrenia and emotional bipolarity coming from? What has gone wrong with the heads of these people? Yes, the NPP folks cannot stand the testosterone-producing balls of Madam Charlotte Osei, which explains their politically conscious mistaking of a strong woman like Madame Charlotte Osei for political transsexual and intellectual transvestite?

It is obvious that the NPP folks have no effective political strategy to win the hearts of the masses and therefore they think they must rely on their state of political deliria for survival. What do these NPP folks actually want, we ask again?

DR. RICHARD ANANE AND UNDEMOCRATIC NPP

Dr. Anane, a respected member of the NPP, was reported to have said:

“Lack of respect for the viewpoints of others in the party is very worrying. When you are in a party and accept the fact that it is made up of all manner of people, not all of them will share your view. This is one of the major things some of us think seem to be going on currently in the NPP which may not augur well for the party but because of its dynamism that it also why I believe the party will purge itself of whatever is alien and ensure that the true beliefs of the NPP succeed…”

“If you look at charges proffered against them then you want to believe that there is something amiss. We believe that whatever happens we should be able to solve our problems at home. My worry is that once this thing happens in the NPP, we should not be thinking it’s just the NPP problem, we should be looking at the entire democratic dispensation in the country; because it could also happen in the NDC tomorrow, next time it could even happen to a presidential candidate, that is why some of us think that the party will have to sit up and purge itself of whatever that will not inure to the benefit of the democratic dispensation that we are in. I know the party is capable of doing this…”

CONCLUSION

Could it be what David Hinds of Steel Pulse calls “Wild Goose Chase”? In other words, how do we exactly save these NPP folks from further psychological damage? Well, Hinds’ “Wild Goose Chase” deals with the serious question of the abuse of science and technology, but it appears the deranged psychology behind this abuse of technology is emblematic of the deeply political psychology of the leadership of the NPP. The reader should simply replace “the abuse of science and technology” with “the freedom of speech, conscience, and press” and see what our dubious democracy looks like. Our dubious democracy is a mongrel of kleptomania and slavocracy. Not less.

Listen to Hinds:

“What is wrong with these people…Cloning cats to have dogs; Human beings breeding hogs; On the moon in search of aliens; But now dem dog gone crazy; Mass producing test tube babies…Oil a wild goose chase; Laws of nature they just can't face; Ambition is to mash up the place; Who shall save the human race?...”

Wild goose chase, the confused NPP? What do these NPP folks actually want? Which aliens are these NPP folks looking for on the moon? Why have “dem dog crazy? Why are they “cloning cats to have dogs? What are they looking on the moon? Why do they want to “mash up the place” with their lies, fabrications, and ethnocentrism? We do not know! Only time will tell what these people want. But until they are able to place a finger on their fleeting dreams, they should kiss the “Wild Goose Chase” goodbye! Let venture to say that the great Fela Kuti would have called this clueless behavior of the NPP “expensive shit”! Perhaps he could equally have called it more than that!

What a confused bunch of wild geese! The NPP is everywhere in the body and soul of this satirical lyrical bluntness, Hinds’ “Wild Goose Chase”! And where is that third political to kick these two political parties out of their duopolistic entrenchment of comfort, if we may ask the people?

We shall return…

Reference

Ghanaweb. “Afari Gyan Much Better Than Charlotte Osei—NPP.” Sourced from citifmonline.com. February 23, 2016.

Ghanaweb. “Dr. Anane Must Purge Itself of Alien Happenings.” Sourced from Kasapafmonline.com. February 22, 2016.