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Opinions of Friday, 10 August 2012

Columnist: Appiah, Okofrompa Asantiniba Kwame

New Urban Dictionary for Ghana

New words that have appeared in the Ghanaian lexicon mainly due to the actions or inactions of officials, people in higher and lower places. Some of these words have been around forever but got new or updated meaning. This is a funny take on happenings in Ghana. Enjoy!

1. To do a Spio: Any individual who claims he has a doctorate degree knowing he has never defended a dissertation for a PhD nor ever attended and graduated medical school. Having 1,000 masters degrees does not equal a PhD.

2. Gyan-Gyan tuan folly: Premature celebration of an event. Example when one celebrates a penalty while the ball has not crossed the goal line.

3. Gargantuan: Old word but resurrected to mean anything of gigantic proportions usually achieved by unnatural means. Example my neighbor hit the jackpot with a gargantuan win from the national lotteries.

4. To do a Painstil: Show off in an expensive vehicle that ends up breaking down in public. Or running out of gas while driving an expensive gas guzzling car.

5. Wayomised: Verb describing swindling acts usually of gargantuan proportions

6. To do Focking Boy: Any sane or semi-sane man or woman who exposes privates in public. Example Britney Spears did a Focking Boy when she hit the town with no panties.

7. All die be die: Desperate rally cry to supporters

8. Ecomimi: Stumbling or struggling to pronounce big words

9. Over de barrrrrrrrrr: New name for anyone who skies a penalty kick. Example Asamoah “Over de Bar” Gyan.

10. Judgment debt: When one government cancels a contract signed by a previous government and Ghana ends up paying multiple times over to settle the initial cancellation and associated interest that usually exceed the original debt.

11. Claim a logo: AKA take your ball and run. Claim something is yours to end a game when things don’t go your way. Example Nana Konadu claimed the NDC logo when she lost the primaries.

12. To do a Balotelli: Refuse to celebrate ones achievement in a field of endeavor. Opposite of Gyan-gyan tuan folly.

13. Land grab: Steal or acquire parcels of land in choice areas using ones position of influence. Both NPP and NDC have been accused of Land grab when in power.

14. Chin Quan Chang: Chinese nationals doing galamsay in Ghana.

15. Made in China: Any inferior product on the Ghanaian market. Can also refer to any product sold in Wal-Mart

16. They are from Nigeria: Initial public reaction to anybody caught in armed robbery, internet scam, 419 or advance fee fraud in Ghana. Usually accompanied by they are Nigerians using Ghanaian names.

17. I got that right: TB Joshua claiming to have prophesied an event after it had already happened. BTW can I get next week’s lottery numbers?

18. You are invited: NPP inviting dignitaries to presidential inauguration way before actual election

19. S3 asa:. An Akan word meaning it is finally over.

20. We are in mourning: An excuse not to get anything done in Ghana because Ghanaians are mourning President Atta Mills. Example SHS placement suspended because of death and funeral of President Atta Mills. According to Samuel Oppong, “Because of the President’s funeral and a whole lot activities people will not pay attention to the placement system”. Really!

Okofrompa Asantiniba Kwame Appiah MSLC, GCE O’Level, A’Level (2X), BSc, MSc, PhD, CNA, CFA, CPA, OIG, CNN, ATF, FBI, CNN, RIP, S3 asa!