Letter From The President: Priamaries ?Wahala?

Countrymen and women, bootlicking-loyalists and backstabbing opponents,
I have been keenly following with a mixture of amusement and delight recent events in my party. I am talking specifically about the parliamentary primaries, which have seen certain ?heavyweights? lose the right to vie for a seat in the Sikaman legislature. Many have asked me why I am not bothered about the hullabaloo. I told them that I don?t care. Yes. I don?t care at all who contests to become an MP where. For now, my heart is very gladdened with the belief that the people of Sikaman will vote and vote massively for me in December. I am very much aware that a similar primaries ?wahala? contributed to the defeat of the Not-so Democratic Congress in 2000. But I have a strong, unshakeable belief that what caused Tata Mills? downfall can help me stand stronger. That?s one of my remarkable features ? I love to embrace what my opponents fear to touch with a thousand feet pole.