Letter From The President: Jerry Boom is wising up

Countrymen and women, bootlickers and ?against? people, Jerry Boom announced last Friday that he has gotten a little bit wiser. I believe that makes some of you want to shout ?Thank you, Lord?. Well, I am not in any thankful mood ? I am very worried. Someone is pumping some sense into Jerry Boom?s head and I am not happy. Just look at the arrogance with which he gloatingly made his announcement last Friday. ?I will not make the government happy by ?booming? today?, he declared at the June 4 rally. He even knows that I get very happy when he ?booms? ? mount a stage and speak by heart, threatening fire and brimstone if we don?t live by his high standards of misrule.

What even annoys me most is that just a few days after he announced his newfound wisdom, Jerry Boom was awarded an honourary degree in management in recognition of his leadership qualities. If that award was not bought, I don?t know how else Jerry Boom earned it ? he mismanaged our economy, our educational system, our telecom infrastructure and even his own party and led us into a lurch. Wonders will never end and it seems Jerry Boom?s latest award confirms the letter I wrote just a few days ago about cheap honours being thrown at people who have decided to engrave mediocrity on their hearts.