Letter From The President: Hello, Mr. Chairman

Countrymen and women, loyalists and opponents
I hope that despite the frequent power outages, you have heard the news on radio and read in the newspapers that I am the new chairman of the Union of Backward African States, better known as the AU. I was unanimously elected at our annual tea-drinking and back-patting conference in Addis Ababa. It’s an honour I am delighted to share with all citizens of Sikaman – I am not that selfish, you know.
As you may recall, I was one of the first leaders to arrive in Addis for the conference. I was there on Saturday morning – when the Ga Mantse’s funeral was being held. The conference itself started on Monday. Some of you have criticised me for failing to show up at the main funeral celebrations of the Ga monarch and allowing Jerry to steal the show. Some also thought me a fool for failing to take advantage of the celebration to mourn with the Ga people and make it known to them that once they bury their chief and install a new one, not all foreign dignitaries will be taken to Manhyia – at least, the not-so important ones will be encouraged to pass through the Ga Mantse’s Palace. All criticisms have been taken in good faith. But I want you to know that I am a tactical man and I know what my priorities are.