Letter From The President: A loose presidential tongue

Countrymen and women, loyalists and opponents, as I write this letter, the people of Odododiodio are voting in a by-election election to choose an MP. I am told that my party does not stand a chance. The days leading up to the elections were both exciting and disturbing.

First, there was the confusion at the ?town hall? meeting, during which the candidate of my party, Mantakah, shamefully walked off the stage after the audience booed at him ?small?. He claims he was being interrupted unnecessarily and that the audience was wasting his time. That was the public excuse. But the private truth, which they tried to cover up, was that the guy could not speak good English. Just imagine that he told the gathering that ?English will be made? when he actually meant to say that ?history will be made?