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Opinions of Saturday, 9 December 2017

Columnist: Kobina Ansah

Give as you want to be given

Kobina Ansah Kobina Ansah

“Therefore whatever you desire for men to do to you, you shall also do for them; for this is the law and the prophets.”? Matthew 7:12 [World English Bible]

Back in high school, we had one notorious senior who was the pain in the butt of every first year student. This bully would come to school without a chop box yet only few weeks into the term, would have one full of all the goodies in his dormitory.

Well, force was his language. Those who didn’t understand this language ended up bruised by his tattered belt. He always had his way anyway. He had nothing but owned everything. The monster in him would seize anything it desired… giving no hoot about his poor victims.

His name alone sent students running for their lives. He was literally a god! Eventually, he finished school and all freshmen (now sophomores) heaved a big sigh of relief. We could now have our lunch in peace. We didn’t need to worry about our god breathing on our neck every morning, noon and night.

And then… in our final year, as freshmen arrived, here was our notorious senior. No, he was not a freshman. He was accompanying a rather innocent teenager who was a first year student? his younger brother? his only brother. All the final year students sang in chorus, “Young man, welcome to hell!”

We can’t treat others badly and expect life to treat us well. If you do good for others today, you do good for yourself tomorrow. Life is like a mill. You can’t put maize therein and expect it to churn out cassava. Life is like soil. What we sow… that we reap.

Life runs on the wheels of one simple rule? the golden rule ? treat others as you would have them treat you. Be unto others as you would have them be unto you. Imagine for others as you would have them imagine for you! Treat your employees as you would have another employer treat your children someday. Be the Good Samaritan you would want others to be. Imagine success and goodwill for others as you would want them to imagine for you. As we wish for others, so do we wish for ourselves.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. If each of us had paid heed to this rule, what a bliss this world would have been! If each of us had considered others first, our world would have been free of greed and selfishness.

The golden rule governs every aspect of our lives; marriage, business, governance, name them. What we do unto others, same shall be done unto us… if not by same people, by others. If we treat others right, we shall be treated right, too. When we do well to treat them as though they don’t matter, trust me, same treatment shall be meted out to us sooner or later.

Many relationships end woefully because we flout this simple but golden rule. Many marriages are hitting the rocks because one is treating another as they would not have another treat them. They spite their spouses. They cheat on the same people they vowed at the altar to stick to. They beat to pulp the same spouses they promised to protect. Give what you want to receive.

When you think about others, you think about yourself. Before you lift a finger, put yourself in the shoes of your victim. Before you defile your matrimonial bed, consider your spouse. Give as you want to be given!

Intermittently, one should ponder, “If I am to be treated as I am treating my spouse now, how would I feel?” Once in a while, a husband should ask himself, “If another man is to treat my daughter as I am my wife, would I congratulate him?” A wife should wonder, “Am I doing unto my husband as I would have another do to my brother?”

It is only when we put ourselves in the shoes of others that we can feel the gravity of their pain. Sometimes, as a man, carrying a baby in your womb for only a month is all you need to change your ill perception about women. Sometimes, putting yourself in their circumstances is all you need to treat them well.

Oftentimes, the turning point of a man’s life, with regards to his treatment towards women, is for him to bleed unendingly for a day. It gives him a hint of how uncomfortable menstruation may look like!

If we had thought about others before taking the decisions we took, no one would be hurt in their marriages because at all times we will be treating our spouses as we want them to treat us. We would be treating our wives as queens if we wanted to be their kings.

There would be no corruption. There would absolutely be no indiscipline in this country.

No one would be selfish because we would have others at heart before we do what we do. We would have our grandchildren at heart before messing up state property. We definitely would remember that someone may extort from us tomorrow what we are extorting from others today for the same jobs we are paid for.

If it is not good for you, it is definitely not good for others. In your marriage, be to your spouse what you would want them to be unto you. At your workplace, be the employee you would want to employ someday. Bad citizens make a bad country just as good citizens make a good one. Do unto your country as you would have your country do unto you. Give as you would ever want to be given!

The writer is a playwright and Chief Scribe of Scribe Communications (www.scribecommltd.com), an Accra-based writing company which provides all writing services.