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Opinions of Monday, 21 January 2013

Columnist: Obeng, Raymond

Becoming The Real Ghanaian Woman

By Raymond Obeng.

‘Guinness, (fried) rice, khebab Finish. Some Ghanaian women are too cheap’. (Translated from Twi into English) -Mz Porsche.

One wonders why some women stoop very low to crystal clear deception exhibited by some good-for-nothing men in our society. These men shower gifts on easily-moved, highly-convinced and totally depressed ladies just to lure them to bed, and have sex with them. Some ladies have been so gullible to such wiles that they have become blind to the truth, and cannot even identify men with good intentions who are poised to lead them to the altar.

While some great-thinking ladies are creating bigger future ideas and finding greater means of making their dreams real in their lives so they will become very useful leaders and outstanding business tycoons in Mother Ghana, others sit down and keep waiting to be wooed by their preys for just something to eat and drink momentarily. They only know how to accept going to bed with men ready to bring to their doorsteps something to sustain them for few minutes. Shower on them well piled-up fried eggs sandwiched with well-chopped onions prepared with well-scented oil served with Guinness, fried rice, khebab among others, and you get them on bed. They are in for what they can enjoy with for a moment, and straight from there to bed (if they are lucky to get men who have rooms with beds) to ‘finish’ (with) them. One sad thing is that most do not think about wherever the sexual activity, which is supposed to be dignified, takes place. Most of these ill-mannered ladies allow themselves to be used in the clear view of the public at beaches, under trees, in dilapidated kiosks, inside and at the side of abandoned vehicles, in bushes, inside uncompleted buildings, in cars parked somewhere at road side, in schools when school sessions are closed, on lecture pews, on office tables and chairs, and in other unwholesome places. But one thing is worth-noting. The Ghanaian woman’s bedfellow should never be disgrace. Disgrace is her strongest enemy. She is supposed to be cautious, polite, humble, dignified, responsible, responsive, courteous, hardworking, accountable among others. She is a woman of substance poised to brighten wherever she goes. She is not an opportunist. She is able to screen deceitful guys who hide behind the good and the expected to visit on the society’s most discipline women, mental torture after they have tasted their well-kept flesh against their true will. She is not perturbed about the vicissitudes of life, because she knows they exist, and that she cannot run away from them. Instead, she relies on strategically life-tested steps to deal with them as they show up so she can overturn them for her good, and have a good message for her descendants, especially, her kids someday somewhere.

Modernism has begun eroding and uprooting the basic fundamental principles of the pride of the Ghanaian woman. Some people, nowadays, act not based on civility, and the finest of our cultural heritage and its polished customs and practices. For we know that some of the practices are remote, and as such some need real change, but at least, we can boast of some practices which when applied can make life well meaningful, and will empower us as people ready to bring real development in Ghana. Love, honesty, hard work, responsibility, justice, gentleness, punctuality, mercy, kindness among others are embedded in our culture. Lies, lack of patience, gullibility, procrastination, hatred, carelessness, indolence, insolence, corruption, the inability to wait for the opportune time, and the love for money, fun, fame and dominance are our greatest enemies. Our forefathers taught, and still teach us by way of their landmarks the right way of life. Our school curricula gravitate us towards discipline. Our homes entertain loyalty and being wise as the ant. But if at home and in the school, we have the idea of ‘like father like son’, or ‘like mum like daughter’ and ‘like educator like learner’ respectively where indiscipline, corruption, irresponsibility and other forms of irregularities reign, then we have thrown away our manhood and womanhood as true Ghanaians.

Life is good, and must be enjoyed in the right manner. Life is not about having fun while we ignore our sense of humanity, and do whatever we like. In life we act not based on our emotions, but on principles. Life is full of principles, and they must be respected and obeyed. Anything outside it creates chaos, and is unacceptable.

On the other side of the coin, life is full of calamities. It is full of falling stones, but our ability to maintain a balance will make us successful. We may face the death of those who really make us happy, and those whose lives bring hope and blessedness to us. We may be faced with abject poverty that has the capacity to drive us insane. We may wish to aspire to be great, but if we do not have the means, life becomes bitter, and then we become depressed. Bitterness and depression are thieves and killers. They steal and kill our joy, and leave us with sadness. Chaotic situations and most health issues recorded these days are the results of bitterness and depression. Life will be very bitter in Ghana if our true Ghanaian women are victims of these health hazards. Success in Ghana has always been made together with our hardworking and trustworthy women. We cannot afford to lose them.

As a woman trying to make earns meet, maybe, you have to be the first to let go of what you have done and apologize. If you do, you become the bravest. Maybe, you have to be the first to forgive yourself, someone, a whole tribe, a whole institution or a whole nation. If you do, you become the strongest. Maybe, you have to be the first to forget about what has happened, or what someone, a whole tribe, a whole institution or a whole nation did to you. If you do, you become the happiest. Maybe, you have to be first to avoid crushing your spirit. If you do, you become the most cheerful person in your environs. Maybe, you have to be the first to stop comparing yourself to other people. If you do, you become the most original Ghanaian woman among your peers. Maybe, you have to be the first to love your very enemies. Though very difficult to do, but if you stand focused and you do, you become the world’s greatest. Life surely will present to us its negative part, but when it does, we do not have to turn around and accept anything as the best. The real Ghanaian woman is not ignorant of the fact that every day brings new challenges. She is aware that in spite of all the unexpected, the crows of the cock at dawn signal to her that the morning is coming to give her a new grace to meet the demands of the day. Life is not about drinking, eating and having sex. May we ever be right as citizens. May our guys give maximum respect to our women. May our women become priceless, comely, and builders of their inner resources. May Mother Ghana be blessed.

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