It is appropriate to take this opportunity to welcome back the headmaster who went chaperoning in Israel. Indeed your absence has redirected the searchlight off this great school but now that you are back we welcome you to the same school which you have managed to corrupt unashamedly. Now that you are back, may we go straight to work and tackle the issues on the table. You know, there are rumours flying all over the place about the purpose for which you chose to chaperon students and left this great school unattended to. The mentality is clear, “the more one flies the more important the person appears” in the eyes of the ignoramuses. There is no doubt that you’ll come back to receive the usual sycophantic ‘daddy’ tunes up there. Now, the rumours.

• That you undertook this trip to shift the negative attention you have had so far from you.

• That your wardrobe has dried up so you went to get new suits for your numerous colleague headmasters who line up asking for some suits to wear. But really, how many suits have you given out so far?

• That as an aspiring evangelist you went to the land of Moses to get some ‘holy’ water from the River Jordan. That river heals, you know! You remember the Syrian Leper, don’t you? Did you perchance visit the birth place of Christ? If not then go back.

• Some even said you have gone there to fortify yourself spiritually to counter your perceived enemies and teach them spiritual lessons, Is it true the personal God you always talk about will do that?; especially so when you have used your wife’s birthday to commission your own church christened WORD POWER MINISTRIES(FOR) SALVATION, HEALING AND DELIVERANCE.

We must say that we agree with the word deliverance because you seriously need it. Having welcome you back with some pieces of gossip in the grapevine lets now concentrate on the main issues of the day. They are mostly about the other aspects of the school’s ACCOUNTS which are not known to the EOCO OFFICERS. This has become an issue because you said in Takoradi that Adisco earns only Gh 1200.00 annually as Internally Generated Funds (IGF) You sure know that this is not true. Do I need to explain? Anyway, thanks to the PTA chairman. What did you go to his office to do? We remember you always wanted him to come to you.

1) Of the 2225 students in the school now each student pays Gh 10.00 per term. Multiply that amount by the number of students and tell us how much is expended on the houses. Does this money pass through the school’s Accounts?

2) Clearance form goes for Gh 6.00 per student for making the “mistake” of completing school at Adisco. Multiply this by the number of Leavers averaging 550 students.

3) Bond fee is Gh 50.00 for normal offenders and Gh 70.00 for offenders who have the misfortune of being asked to stay in school for two days after vacation. I remember last term 183 students who went to swim without permission were each bonded on a fee of Gh 50.00 amounting to over Gh 7000.00. Did this money pass through the school’s Accounts? But where is the money?

4) We have information that for Transcripts the school takes Gh 10.00, Certificates-Gh 3.00 and Gh 8.00 per student. Multiply this by the number of students and you still get Gh 12.000.00 eh? 5) What have you got to say about the under -supply of materials to the students?

6) How much do you make personally for renting the school premises to church groups and the like? Do you account for that?

7) Did you also say that you spent Gh 18.000.00 for organizing a party for the non –teaching staff? Ebei Kwesi Graham, we want the proof. How? You, spending Gh 18.000.00 for party? It can never happen under your watch. If you do that how can you pay for your child’s fees? (I mean the one on scholarship and studying abroad) eeeih! we nearly forgot, it could be possible that some friends are paying for you since you have always had the special favour of God. We hear of all that go on in the school.

8) Somebody has just whispered into our ears. The last Speech day each student paid Gh 30.00. Multiply that by 2225 students. Adisco aye de, bebia awu. Eh! Nana Boro’s friend.

In the next edition of the ROT IN ADISCO we shall go back into archives and look at the school uniforms that the Late Kitson left behind of which you used for many years without buying new ones. What did you use that money for? May we help you? Try and keep the receipts that have not seen the light of day for many years. What about the cost of computer repairs sometimes inflated from mere Gh 500.00 to Gh 3.200.00. Do you remember the old boy that used to repair school computers? He reported this to you and he was never given any contract again. The EOCO OFFICERS are coming ooh!

To conclude on this episode may we once again wish you a hero’s welcome. No Adisco headmaster was ever destined to travel to Israel and after you no headmaster in Ghana will ever get such an opportunity because it is not the WILL of God. The Son Of God himself.

Yours sincerely

Very Worried Santas

Meet you at Saturday’s Congress