From emotional abuse to mental homes: Woman shares how marriage ruined her life

"I didn't believe in divorce and so I stayed. I didn't want to let my children down," these are the words of a UK-based Ghanaian woman who suffered emotional abuse in her marriage that nearly cost her her life.

Janet White popularly known as Obaa Yaa Pokuaa got married at the age of 21 years to her first boyfriend. A good-looking man who her family rejected.

Although she followed her heart and went ahead with the marriage, life became a living hell until she opted for a divorce at the age of 40.

Janet was in and out of mental homes and kept on medication to keep her sane. The most terrible part of her ordeal was when her children had to see her go through such episodes.

Speaking on the Okukuseku show with Emelia Brobbey, she hoped that her story will motivate women who are in abusive relationships to find strength and leave.

"Somehow within me, I had to find inner strength because I didn't want to die in that state. We all have that strength, you just have to tap into it. I decided that I had to find myself.

"I started believing that the problem is me. My man made me believe it was my fault. I started believing and accepting it for 21 years...it became the norm," she said.

Now 54 years old, Janet who relocated to the United Kingdom at the age of 15 years is blessed with three children and two grandchildren.

She added that living abroad hasn't been easy, especially when there is no family around you. "It is really hard," she said adding that her ex-husband managed to drive away all those who mattered in her life.

"My experience was never what I expected marriage to be...I went through pain and emotional abuse which ended me up at the mental home. That was where the marriage ended me...I felt it was okay because that was my first relationship and he was my first man. I thought things were going to get better, but I got worst and I was put on Antidepressants to make me sane.

"When you face these challenges, you expect friends and family to be there for you but that wasn't the case. The man I married managed to drive away all those who cared for me. It was just my children who knew about what was happening...it took the grace of God to break away and get saved," she disclosed in the interview monitored by GhanaWeb.

Janet mentioned that her partner made sure that friends and family had no clue about what she went through.

She has credited God for saving her life from "emotional and mental damage" and giving her a second chance at life.



OPD/BB