Dear GhanaWeb,

I am struggling with something I never imagined would happen in my life. I have been intimate with my father. It started in December last year. He is 63 and I am 29.

He was living alone, just as I was. My relationships have repeatedly failed, yet I desire marriage. Many times, I cried to him about how men treated me unfairly and how much it hurt me.

We lost our mother nine years ago, and since then, he has done his best to raise and support us. He often talks about how much he misses her and how lonely he feels. He says he doesn’t even want to retire because he fears being alone.

I am the lastborn and the only daughter. My two older brothers are married.

After a devastating heartbreak in October last year, a two-year relationship that ended when I discovered the man had a wife and child in another region, I became emotionally broken.

During that period, I suggested that my father move in with me so we could keep each other company. I was depressed and didn’t want to be alone. He agreed.

We began living together peacefully. We went to work during the day and returned home at night. We cooked, cleaned, and spent time together. He made me feel safe and happy again. Somewhere along the line, my feelings changed.

He stopped feeling like just my father. I began developing romantic feelings for him. I attempted to initiate intimacy several times, but he resisted. Eventually, one night, it happened.

Since then, we have been intimate multiple times. He sometimes says he feels ashamed. He says he has failed as a father and that what we are doing is wrong. He now wants to move back to his own place and live alone again.

But I don’t want him to leave. I feel like I love him. I don’t want another man. I have never felt this way before.

I know society would condemn this. I know it sounds wrong. But he makes me feel safe in a way no other man has. I am even willing to have a child for him and continue this relationship.

I am not financially dependent on him. I am a medical doctor and can take care of myself. I am simply tired of dishonest men who cheat and lie. My heart has been broken too many times.

How do I convince him to stay? He says it is wrong and wants to end it. I don’t want him to break my heart too. Please, I need advice.

FG/EB

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