Ghana Telecoms: The Next Stop On The Gravy Train?

“The show you are about to watch
Is a news parody.
Its reporters are not journalists.
Its stories are not fact-checked.
Its opinions are not fully thought through.”

- Intro, "The Daily Show, Global Edition” on CNN.

Throughout last week, one of the major developing stories was that my government had terminated the management contract it had with the Norwegians at Ghana Telecoms (GT) and appointed our own kith and kin to run the company. The Board announced a new management for GT, effectively saying goodbye to Telecom Management Partners (TMP) of cold, icy Norway.

On Monday, Dec. 11, 2006, the Daily Graphic newspaper, ‘Ghana’s biggest-selling newspaper since 1950’, reported that the workers of GT had declared their support for the decision of the government not to renew TMP’s contract. In the opinion of the workers, Ghanaians could manage GT better than any foreigner, considering the performance of expatriates who had managed it. According to the report, the workers stated that TMP for instance had promised to provide 300 to 400 lines since they took over the company but failed to achieve that. Further, in spite of the unsatisfactory performance of the TMP officials, they were paid better than their Ghanaian counterparts. For instance, a minimum of $8000 a month was paid as salary to a Telenor official in addition to free fuel, electricity and accommodation while their Ghanaian counterparts on the same level did not enjoy such salary and benefits. The workers therefore called on the government to create the necessary environment for the staff of GT to work effectively and efficiently. Well said, if you ask me! Typically Ghanaian!! Always after the fact!!!

Enter my government! The Minister of Communications is reported to have confirmed government’s decision to terminate the management contract with TMP. More importantly, Mr. Minister reiterated that my government believed absolutely in the competence and capability of the Ghanaian, as confirmed by the decision not to renew the contract with TMP. Notably, he announced that my government was seriously working on privatising GT, by offloading a percentage of its shares to ‘Every Ghanaian Living Everywhere’. As part of the policy of privatization, a strategic investor was being sought to take a majority stake in the company. He said that my government was aiming at achieving this sometime in the next year.

Enter the praise singers! They seem to be everywhere these days as it may be the most lucrative local business. According to the commentariat, this was a very solid decision by my government. My government’s refusal to renew the management contract with TMP showed that my government believed in the efficiency and work ethos of the Ghanaian. It was also a realization that Ghana could not continue to spend huge sums of money on the few expatriate staff and on the management fees of TMP when essentially, the job was being done by Ghanaians. The commentariat has generally hailed the move as a master stroke by my government. Foreigners have been bleeding us dry and we just could not afford to let that continue. Especially when we are just about to celebrate 50 years of life in the desert, having lost the map to Canaan!!! According to my government, the decision to terminate the Icemen laid somewhere between patriotism and costs.

Now, let us pause for reflections! Why has the Ghanaian become so predictable? Is it a good decision that the management contract will not be renewed? I hope you will give thought to the reasons that have been assigned so far for the decision because that is what tickled me in the first place. A sudden belief in the Ghanaian just when a major entity such as GT was to be privatized? According to my government, one major plank of the entire corporate strategy for GT is to raise additional equity by the government offloading its stake to private investors. This will include you and me as ordinary citizens. Privatisation by definition also makes no distinction between the colours of the money. There will therefore be no distinction between Ghanaian and non-Ghanaian in our bid for investors in GT. My government itself has stated unambiguously that it will look for a strategic investor to take a stake in GT. Can anyone help me out here? A Ghanaian strategic investor? A Ghanaian consortium, again? Or an established international player in the Telecoms industry? Let’s try and trawl through the maze a little. In my imagination, I have dismissed the notion of a Ghanaian strategic investor. There are Ghanaians with the wherewithal, financially to take the stake but I am not sure whether they will have the technological savvy to manage GT by themselves. It can be done but it is just not feasible and so far, has not happened with any of the major privatizations of public utilities that I know of on this continent. Moreover, unless you are a Ghanaian with a British or American citizenship, you will be courting a dance with wolves if you decide to flex your financial muscle by wading into these waters. Down South, wealth, even when it’s within the party, is always looked upon with suspicion and you may wake up one day to find that what you considered yours had never in fact been yours. You were holding it in trust for the people!

What about the Ghanaian consortium? That is also very feasible. Indeed, it has been shown in this country that with the requisite brains and financial skills and the right ‘buoyancy’, you don’t even need to have the dough. It can be generated by a beautiful business plan. So a Ghanaian consortium may very well be able to get this strategic stake in GT and then run same on Ghanaian lines. It’s a possibility but not a probability. The real probability, from conventional wisdom and historical antecedents is that the strategic investor in GT will definitely be another foreign entity. So I wonder why my government is going to town about its belief in Ghanaman’s ability to deliver as ultimate Manager of GT. A foreign strategic investor may bring a lot more to the table and may actually be what my government is looking for. Now get this: No strategic investor, be it a Ghanaian consortium or foreign investor, will cede control over the management of GT! Period! Chuku chaka, chuku chaka… the gravy train has left the station oooo!

If, as my confused mind tells me, a foreign investor is the most probable option, then all this talk about delivering GT into Ghanaian hands as result of our conversion to belief in self is all…”camouflage and concealment”. I know we are expected to have only 24 hour memory span but do you remember the genesis of the GIA journey to The Hague? Do you remember board meetings being convened and held in the Castle by persons who were neither directors nor members of management? If white men could be summoned, do you think that a Ghanaman would have the nerve to say nay to requests for appointments to offices and contracts? Any foreign entity that buys a strategic stake in GT will bring its management team or at worst, determine who runs GT. Any attempt by my government to dictate who manages GT after privatization will not work and will also make any beneficial deals highly improbable. No government anywhere on the surface of this earth can seek to transfer a strategic stake in a public institution to a private foreign entity for value and still demand that you leave the old management team in place. Not even Putin’s Russia! So where from all this talk of a sudden belief in the Ghanaian management?

So here’s how the gravy train works. Get the foreigners who don’t understand that we are lords of all we survey out. We may not be too sure about their ‘marginal propensity to play ball’ at such a strategic time. We just cannot afford any battles at this time as to how we manage the privatization process. After all, we are spending so much money on them and it’s an easier spin than most. As for my people, they know who gave them the job so we will have a relatively smooth playing field to manage the process. We have no time for silly questions from these foreigners that will and may very well poke their noses into matters that don’t concern them. In any case, it is fairly easier to get a local consortium to take this ‘juicy juice’, all in the name of ‘Ghanaianisation’. We can also get our people positioned for take-off in the company. Its time to get busy, stupid! This a property-owning era and we must help make loads of property for those who believe! If we can get a foothold into this communication giant, ourselves, our children and our ‘grandchildren-children’ would have been guaranteed passports to eternal bliss. Even if we have a difficulty swinging a consortium in these muddy media waters, we can still be positioned for take-off in this period so that before the strategic investor lands, we may have linked up already and taken our cut or we can be safely embedded within the organization to take the undoubted benefits of our ‘property-owning’ policies.

So my people, dream on. Most Ghanaians have a 24 hour memory span. I demand that you forget all that you have heard in the past 24 hours. I expect you will not remember a thing about my government swearing an oath of belief in the Ghanaian as a reason for sacking the foreign contingent from GT when 6 months or so from today, another batch of foreigners take over GT. I expect you to applaud everything that my government will do in its avowed bid to create wealth for you and for your children. Where’s the gravy train? Jump on before it makes the next stop at GT.

“Chuku chaka, chuku chaka, chioooooooooo!!!

P/S: The report you have just read
Is a news parody.
The reporter is not a journalist.
The story is not fact-checked.
The opinions are not fully thought through.

JOE ABOAGYE DEBRAH Esq.
Accra.

Views expressed by the author(s) do not necessarily reflect those of GhanaHomePage.