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Opinions of Sunday, 18 February 2018

Columnist: Dr. Arthur Kobina Kennedy

On relationships and cooking

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I have read with bewilderment the quarrels on the above.

Before I opine on the substance, let me gently knock some things aside.

It is a bit presumptuous to declare that another woman is " not half the woman my wife is". How would you know? Are all of us not God's children?

It is also a very wild leap to compare having a boyfriend with having a husband. The fact that you played for Tetekaasum LA XI does not mean you know how it feels like to play for Barcelona. To use an analogy, when a man is getting free milk from a cow he has not paid for, his responsibilities are very different from how he relates to a cow he has paid for.

And by the way, to the men, a woman looking for a ring is very different from one with a ring. She might be better or WORSE.

A lady asserted in the debate that she would NOT use her money to buy a car while waiting for her boyfriend to buy her a car. Really? What if he cannot afford It? Remember, the Taj Mahal was built for a woman-- but she was not loud.

Now to the serious youth looking for guidance.
There are more women than men on earth. There are more women looking for partners than men.

About half of marriages fail within 5 years and the percentage is rising.

Marriage is cultural and based on the 2 individuals.

Be careful about listening friends who know nothing about marriage and following popular fads. The woman who sang "I am a single lady" is happily married.

In a partner, seek kindness, selflessness and diligence. A taxi driver with 3 daughters once told me, "Of my daughters, the least beautiful will make the best wife" I asked why. "Because each night, she waits for me, warms my food and sits with me while I eat before going to bed. Most nights, while she does this, her mother is asleep".

I have seen partners give care and support in distress that has moved me profoundly as a physician. And I have seen the opposite too.

The debate took wealth for granted but not all partnerships will be blessed with wealth.

As for cooking, sometimes wives cook and the food grows cold while their husbands are eating elsewhere.

Finally, above all, seek the face of God and pray for a partner who will NOT finish you but make you complete! God bless you.